My Yesterdays

I have the laundry done well actually not all done but almost, I am set for the week for work , my lunch is ready and I hope I'm ready. See I take meds for panic attacks and also for help with sleeping well I ran out of the one for sleeping and thought well I have one left lets just cut it in half and use one for last night and the other half for tonight well let me tell you last night didnt go so well I tossed and turned all night long .. I really didn't realized how depended I'm on them. I so hope tonight is not going to be a repeat of last night . I have to go to work tomorrow morning and need my sleep. I was up at 5 am this morning then went and laid back down at 6.30 and didn't wake up till almost 11 how crazy is that .. Talked to my son about it and he said that maybe I should think about getting off of them , It was horrible I had night sweats and everything and to be honest with you they are the lightest dose you can get but it sure did scare me almost got up and took another pill for anxiety but didn't. Again with me luck tonight and if it goes better and I get a good nights sleep I just might keep taking a half of one till I can get myself off of them , then I will start on the ones I take during the day for anxiety. Later...

I have noticed that I will soon be needing some stuff for my dark circles under my eyes and came across this site www.darkcircle-s.com and am going to give it a try. My Mom had so much stuff for her face she so did take care of herself really she did , she did all kinds of treatments to her face to make it look softer and make her wrinkles to soften. I never realized how bad my face looked till the other day looking in the mirror I see that under my eyes are getting dark circles under them, and then see that I have wrinkles. Imagine that Me with wrinkles hmm who would think at age 58 I would have them. I know its not only from age but from so much stress I have been under.. I so so need time for me now which I have been doing a little at a time slowly not use to doing for me always doing for others oh well I guess that is just how I'm but I'm not getting younger and now its time for me to take time for me..

I swear men are such big babies I so would of been to the doctor two or more weeks ago , I have been through bronchitis and I know that is what he had , but he just deals with it three weeks worth well now his cough is getting better but now his tonsils are so swollen he has a hard time breathing.. I didn't know he still had his and then realized that 2 of my 4 kids have there's still also. My back had been hurting me so much because of the allergies and me coughing also again because of the allergies. Hopefully the rain will bring that down a bit but now my body aches because of the rain. Well on good thing is that my back is starting to feel better and my cough is slowing getting better I think because of the rain its making the bad stuff in the air help my allergies .. So its kind of tit for tat .. Trade runny nose and cough for achy body because of the dampness. Well back to hubby he needs to get this taken care of I told him one shot of Penicillin would cure him . But he is fighting it, he has trouble breathing at night because of his throat being so swollen. I wonder how long its going to take him before he goes to the doctor.

I have a confession to make this post is kind of not what most people like to read but I have to find some natural hemorrhoid treatment because between work and whatever , I don't know if its sitting allot or what I need some relief. I have tried others but this product seems to be a little more easier on the body. Well enough about that lets talk about going through some of my stuff and downsizing hmm been hard to do. Yesterday we took all of my candle stuff up to an Auction house to be Auctioned off I don't have the time or whatever to put it all up on eBay .. So goodbye candle stuff lets hope it goes to a good home. I do have to say I really didn't realize how much I had till it was laid out on the tables. Well ya wow it seems that is all I'm doing lately is saying goodbye to my things. Well after seeing what we had to move so many times and see what we have I think downsizing is a good thing I'm so done with holding on to stuff that I don't need, we have a whole storage unit and a whole garage and whole section of a basement full of stuff to get rid of yet .. Oh well wish me luck.

I'm not liking it but I guess there is nothing I can do about it , It makes my body ache and just wish we was in a warmer climate and someplace so I wouldn't have to worry about being cold anymore. I so want to move out were Christy is my oldest I so miss her so much like I have said before she is my rock and always will be. I'm so glad that my son is here otherwise I would be nuts by now. We have gotten everything out of the Mom's house and the new owners have moved it and ya know what they have a little baby and I think mom would be happy that love is in that house.. I know its not what she wanted but it is what it is .. what a saying that is.. Later...

Been eating all the bad things again.. I work all day and just sit there and eat and eat lol.. Need to start eating better stuff and need a little help like adipex p that might help curb my appetite. I might have to walk around the building on my breaks because of not getting enough exercise. That might help me with my trying to lose a little weight. They have a thing at work about losing weight but I didn't join it. I guess I was a little shy about doing that sounds like to much work to me. Its a busy Sunday and have been doing laundry getting ready for the new work week,. At least I don't have to be there till 9 am .

Well me and my son stopped at a Chinese place today and we ordered one meal to share which we always do . Well first we just ordered on crab Rangoon and on egg roll. Waiter comes over and puts down a whole plate full oh ok so we look inside of the crab Rangoon and there is very little stuff in them. So I go up to the man and say there is very little cream cheese and crab meat in them honestly it looked like they took a butter knife and put a dab in there. The man says thats how they make them.. Well I said then no thanks I don't want them, he just throws up his hands and walks away.. Well if anyone that knows me thats the wrong thing to do. I go back tell my son lets leave I go up tell the man I'm leaving he says No you have to pay for your drinks I say I didn't drink my drink she says get out of here.. hmmm funny never been thrown out of a Chinese place before lol.. it was call the Dragon palace.. Never again will I go back in that place I actually had to grab my son as he was ready to jump over the counter after the guy because he was being disrespectful .. anyway we went down a little further and had some good crab Rangoon yummy.. end of story .. Oh we also went into big lots that store is awesome .. just bought some dog treats that made my poor Papi sick it was something new so I need to stick with the normal stuff he eats..

My oldest daughter use to have a pond , a homemade pond it was just beautiful and the different kind of pond pumps that she had yep she had several different types one was used in the pond and then the other was use to actually look like a outside faucet like is attached to your house the pump would just recycle the water love looking at that one and she and her boyfriend put it all together themselves piece by piece. I'm sure she has a picture of it somewhere I will have to get it from her to post on here.

I guess this weekend is all I have left of whats left at my Mom's house I need to go get the few things that are left there that belong to me. As it turns out my brother as you would call him has manage to sell my moms house no matter what I said or did to try and get it always a wall up and running into. It just got to the point I said the hell with it I'm done it just got to the point were I said I'm done.. Yep he won he got what he wanted Money that's his big thing .. and yes money is nice but you know I probably wont get a dime . but that is ok I have something he will never ever take away from me is my time I had with my Mom she was my everything my whole life, and what I got out of that time with my mom NO ONE can ever take away from me its so a million dollars will never be enough to take that away from me.

My daughter Christy will be getting married soon , don't know exactly when but when she does I wish she would have a big wedding one were I can get some wedding napkins like I had when I got married it was so cool and I have those reminders with your name and wedding date on them. Unlike the cake and all the other accessories that get tossed away. I still have my napkin in my wedding book from when I got married and actually have the newspaper clip of my wedding day. It's something to look back on, because memories is really all we have left in our life.